Well now – It’s been a hot minute, hasn’t it?
I have to say that recently I just haven’t been feeling like myself. I couldn’t quite put my finger on what the problem was… until this morning. I’ve been battling a nasty backache that stemmed from digging my car out of a snowbank over a month ago. My friend came and managed to sweet talk a plow driver into helping but evidently the damage was already done. So… I have had this backache that has literally made me feel like a pariah. I haven’t wanted to do anything that I enjoy. Add to that the effects of winter – and my incessant eating…. Cripes!
Anyway, this morning I got out of bed and literally FELT heavy. Like, my legs were struggling to carry my body and I just felt large, sluggish, and (the dreaded F-word) FAT! I shrugged it off and carried on with my morning. However, internally a light bulb must have went off.
I snuck onto the scale at work today and my jaw hit the floor. I stepped off and back on, thinking that clearly something was wrong with the scale. Nope…that number is right. I won’t post the actual number because I am ASHAMED of myself. However, suffice it to say…. It’s a good 30lbs over my previous heaviest point. No wonder I’ve been achy and been feeling…. heavy. Because my body is CRYING OUT for help. It doesn’t like it!
I have to say, my heart and me head agree with my body — we no likey. I already knew something was up – my clothes have been a little snug (although at an additional 30 lbs – I would have thought I’d be up a size or two?) Anyway… I had already ordered the Advocare challenge. However… I don’t know if I can wait for that to arrive.
I am literally having a minor panic attack. What have I been doing to myself!? I will say that other aspects of my life have been spiraling out of control as well. I’ve managed to grab the reins and gain some control the past few weeks. I have found a program that helps spell out cleaning and de-cluttering. Something I also desperately need. I’m having pretty giid success with this plan. However, I need to now focus on decluttering my body.
I *will* post more regularly here on my progress. 🙂